“A Day in the Life of the Artist,” by Jake Baskins

December 10, 1997  Wednesday

Jake took some liberties in telling of the events that happened to me tonight.  In the next entry I’ll tell my side of it.  By for now, since he’s a guest to his journal, here’s Jake’s little story:

“Wednesday night I went with Brandon, Tom, and the very cool Jake to Walmart.  I said I wanted to get some Christmas presents, but I would probably just blow it all on CDs.  I intended to take some money out of the ATM machine and then take a taxi back, letting my friends go back without me, because I’d take a hell of a long time.  Being the Left-Handed Artist that I am, I did not check to see if I could take out money from the ATM in the beginning, but at the end.  At this point I had all of my shopping done, and in the little metal cart.  When I tried to take out my money, the grey ATM machine said, “Hell no boy!”  I’m not very quick, so I tried again and again, and kept getting the same answer.  Not satisfied with the Walmart ATM machine, I walked 13 city blocks to the K-mart ATM machine, and of course I got the same answer.  A little discouraged and intimidated by those damn machines, I shouted out, “Damn, I hate that Bob Barker!’  This eased the tension and I was really hungry so I stopped at Hardees.  I met a fine older fellow that was puffing on a pipe while telling me about his life.  I’m really backwards, and I had no money, so the idea of calling a cab was out of the question.  The I had this idea to call my roommate and see if his girlfriend would walk to Q-lot to get her car and pick me up in the middle of December.  Since I am always Even-Steven, my roommate and his girl came and got me.  By this time I was very, very, very, very, very, very cold and tired of walking (the Frightening Turtle Effect).  I’m just lucky I have the friends I do, because being an Artist, I don’t know how the hell I’d get through the day without them.”

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